fearlessMoney is generally not that important to me. Of course I need it as much as anyone else. Money is not generally a primary objective. Doing good, feeling good about oneself, peace of mind, the relief of pain and suffering – these are the things that matter to me!

“Real freedom is having nothing. I was freer when I didn’t have a cent.”

~ MIKE TYSON, Sports Illustrated, Mar. 1988

It is not surprising that someone as ‘otherworldly’ as I am, I do appreciate the fact that my partner, is practical and down to earth. He is on top of all the details of life and I like that, because I dislike details. I do seek for this quality, as I don’t have it in my nature.  He helps me so much as this quality, gives me a feeling of being grounded, of being in touch with reality.

Thank you my love for providing me with so much balance! Another great quality in life!

But the greater of all, to me at least, it is the gift of freedom.

They asked…

–        What is really freedom about?

“Freedom is the right and capacity of people to determine their own actions, in a community which is able to provide for the full development of human potentiality. Freedom may be enjoyed by individuals but only in and through the community.”

–        What is freedom to you?

They answer…

–  “Everybody has their own definition of freedom, not only this is a question I’m curious about, but it’s also an idea.

What is freedom to you?

They asked again…

–  To me… To me, freedom is not only being free, but feeling free; to do, to say, to be, to literally (anything) – whatsoever and however, wherever and whenever. Because I am myself, and only I own me, therefore I can, so come what may, I believe I am free, free as a bird.”

But can be possible, does such freedom exist at all?

“The truth shall make you free.”

~ JESUS, John 8:31

To be that free, I think you need to stop caring about what others feels or need. You can’t be free while you care of others. I care means I provide. I provide – sometimes – means I sacrifice. And I sacrifice, means, I take away part of my freedom. And little by little, piece by piece, freedom “pie” is getting less and less.

But while you are giving up “pieces” of your freedom, for the sake of the ones you love, you gain a different type of freedom. The freedom of the choice to sacrifice part of you, because you care. Because of love.

“You want to know what freedom is. ….Freedom is, no FEAR.”

~ Nina Simone

Every time you make a decision, either you pay for it or someone else. Someone you love, someone you care or sometimes, someone that hurt you in the pass. You might not fully realize it, but there is a part in you, seek for revenge. And while you refuse it to yourself, as you want to remain kind and forgiving, at the same time life path, takes you exactly to the revenge “land”. You know is wrong as they teach you all your life that is better to forgive, to forget. You know is wrong to seek for revenge but you can’t help it. So you don’t really take any action, but you let things happen. You call it justice. Perhaps in many cases, it is justice!

Life has this mysterious ways to make things right again. Soon or later, the truth will come out and I am deeply grateful for that.

The road of life has many detours, many alternatives. It is not always the “high way”. Anytime you can choose to “exit” the high way and see where the side road can take you.

There are times in life, we feel this sweet feeling of giving up, losing up a little. Chill out and stop being so responsible about everything in life. After all, you miss your childhood, for the rest of your life. The years, when you didn’t had to be so responsible, you didn’t had to take big decisions. Your bigger concern back then, was coloring or biking? Watch a cartoon or go shopping with mom.

You miss that. And there is a point in your adult life, you finally become that again. You just never realize it fully. One day you just feel a little overwhelmed and then the child wakes up inside of you, mad and angry, telling you to stop being so “perfect”, so responsible, to Mrs. Right. It is not so much fun anymore.

Yup, that’s it. It is not so much fun anymore when you worry too much, when you care too much about everything, about everyone. You can’t please everyone, it is impossible. You will always have “enemies”. So you go back to the “pie” of freedom and you look the missing “pieces” and you realize how stupid you are. Giving away, almost all of your freedom “pieces”, left with only few… it doesn’t look right. You need to come first, time to time.

And that moment, you turn the wheel. You get off the “high way”. It is time to “exit” and find one of those sweet country roads. The ones they take you back, to the simplicity of things. Only when we keep things simple, we can be truly happy. And slowly-slowly you take back your “freedom”, but never the whole “pie”. As long as there are people you love out there, people they matter to you, you don’t even want the whole “pie”. All you want is enough “pieces” to breathe free. And that is good enough, for most of us.

Thank God, nobody is totally FREE, because of LOVE or hatred…

I choose LOVE!

 “When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”

 ~ Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man

 

Koula Rodosthenous Zajac

~Domenica